Adult
Letters
April through June, 1999
My Shoes is a forum where we can meet other multiracial individuals with a white appearance and express our thoughts and feelings.
Adult
Letters
April through June, 1999
My Shoes is a forum where we can meet other multiracial individuals with a white appearance and express our thoughts and feelings.
This page allows members and non-members to ask questions or comment on anything they wish related to the mission of the support group. Help the support group grow by talking to group members, by contributing to discussion topics, by sending your personal story, and by posting announcements on the bulletin board. Join us!
To send your questions or comments press 
Letters:.
Name: Nikki Khanna, Nikki2323@aol.com
Subject: Needed: Half Asian/ half Caucasian adults to
fill short survey
Date: 6/24/99
Hi, I'm a graduate student at the University of Georgia currently conducting a study on adults (at least 18 yrs old) who are half Asian/ half Caucasian. If interested, email me. Thank you.
Name: Jamilla Coleman, jcoleman@glamour.com
Subject: Glamour Magazine Research
Date: 6/22/99
Hi everyone, My name is Jamilla Coleman. I came across this site by chance while doing research about people of mixed race. It's interesting to me and nice to read your stories. I did not really think much about the subject of being interracial (I am not immediately interracial myself) until in the beginning of my freshman year in college, my roommate told me that her mother was white. I did not think it would have much of an impact upon a person these days, until she told me of the drama that has gone on in her family and that she would probably not date anyone other than a black man (she considers herself black) because being mixed was too hard for her growing up.
The research I'm conducting at the moment is for the editorial department at Glamour magazine. I am currently gathering resources for an upcoming article about multi- or bi- racial women between the ages of 18-35 who do not resemble either their mom or dad. We are also seeking women who do not resemble their mom or dad because they are adopted. If any of you who fit any of the descriptions are willing to share your story, please contact me at jcoleman@glamour.com and you can also call me at 212-880-8305. I am not using any of the stories or photographs that are posted on the "my shoes" website. It's not my intent to violate anyone's privacy. But if you are interested, please get in touch with me. Because I have just gotten a new extension, I do not have voice mail, but I should be at my desk during business hours. If anyone who is interested is a little older than 35, that's fine. Right now I am just trying to get as many sources as possible. Thanks for your time and I hope to hear from you soon. If you live in or near New York, it's a plus.
Name: Elaine Martinez, elamarti@bc.cc.ca.us
Subject: My Son
Date: 6/21/99
I am a young mother of a "mixed" child. My fiance is half black and half Portugese. I am Mexican. I am worried about the upbringing of our son. My fiance doesn't have strong black features except for the nose, therefore neither does our son. As a matter of fact his skin color is white. I am tired of people making comments such as, "he isn't black", "he looks like a white boy" What is wrong with society? These comments hurt my feelings. Is it possible my son will have no black features, since he is only 1/4 black? Any suggestions, comments please email me. Thank you
Name: Susan Kane, suekane@umich.edu
Subject: Looking Jewish
Date: 6/16/99
First of all, thanks for a really excellent site. I've already emailed many of my amazing and fabulous multiracial friends to tell them to take a peek.
Jews are a "white" ethnic group that play this same game of "who is in, who is out" almost as much as racial minorities. I put "white" in quotes because although most Jewish people in this country look white, if you go to Israel you know that Jews are not a race but a people, and we come in every color of the rainbow, from Eithiopian to Yemenite to blond haired blue eyed Europeans. Israelis rarely talk about "looking Jewish" but American Jews are somewhat obsessed with it, by which we usually mean pale skin, almond eyes, and black hair, especially very curly hair you rarely find among Americans without black ancestry. Alternately, you can have olive skin and my Jewish friends with this look have been mistaken for black, bi-racial, latino, italian, greek and arab, especially if they grew up in an area without people of color.
You might think that Jews, as a multiracial, diverse people, could get our act together, but I'm afraid to say this is not the case. We talk constantly (I am guilty as well) about who "looks Jewish", who "acts Jewish". Common phrases include "Well, she looks like a shiksa (non Jew), but she's really one of us" "No, he is. He just doesn't act Jewish because he grew up in Minnesota." My Jewish friends who are not white (actually bi racial, or adopted, or black or latino converts to Judaism) are whispered about in synagogue when they walk in. Everyone is surprised when they open the prayer book the right way and start reading Hebrew.
As a blond child who showed my mother's Irish/French/English Catholic ancestry much more than my father's eastern european Jewish ancestry, people told me CONSTANTLY that I didn't look Jewish. This was a real source of shame for me as a child and I felt the need to explain that I was really "only half Jewish" so that they would feel more comfortable (now that I had justified my appearance). I compensated for this by holding on even more tightly to my Jewish heritage (which I loved). Now, I am so knowledgeable and committed that no one can challenge my Jewishness. Despite the fact that I think this is ridiculous, I still find myself worrying about myself and other people "looking Jewish". Even now, as I look for a father for my child (through alternative insemination), I find myself desperately seeking someone with a Mediterranean appearance to balance my light looks, so that my child will always know where they belong. Judaism is a culture. I don't believe in "Jewish blood", so why should I care about this? Stupid.
I often meet multiracial people with Jewish ancestry and I am sad to say that I also hear stories about Jews rejecting their non-white relatives. In my own family, the cousins who have married african americans and puerto ricans have no interest in the Jewish community. I have met multiracial people who want to learn about their Jewish heritage and it pains me that I cannot tell them honestly that they will be welcomed and accepted without question by their fellow Jews. We talk often about how we are "all one people" and how proud we are to be a multiculural people from every corner of the globe. The potential for something really beautiful is there. Maybe soon we will learn to walk the walk.
Name: Maria, seagalmcb@aol.com
Subject: Bi-racial women; 15-35 years
Date: 6/9/99
I am a bi-racial woman and I am writing a book about bi-racial women and their life experiences. If you are a bi-racial woman, 15-35, I would love to hear from you! I am looking for women who have compelling stories to tell about their experiences as bi-racial women in the United States. Below are some of the areas I am researching:
1. Were you raised in a small, all-white town (or in a predominantly African American community)? How were you treated? 2. Have you been harassed or teased because of your unique appearance? 3. Do you feel caught between two different worlds (Black and White) and don't know which one to choose, or don't know if you even want to choose? 4. Were you raised predominantly either African American or White and now you feel you missed out on the other culture? 5. Do you relate more to African Americans or to White people? Do you feel African Americans and White people relate differently to you than they do to other people? 6. How do you feel about the way bi-racial women or light-skinned women are portrayed in literature and movies?
If you have a story or opinion about any of the areas listed above, or any area not covered above, please e-mail me at seagalmcb@aol.com. You do not need to give your full name and address--Your first name, age, and occupation is fine. Thank you in advance for your help! It is greatly appreciated!
Name: elaine, ebj@internetnorth.com.au
Subject: Calling for Support for new website
Date: 6/1/99
Recently I received an email from Luke who has a cool new website for biracial folk. Take some time to visit it and support Luke. The site may be located at meltingpot.fortunecity.com/broadway/522/mulatto.html
Name: Karen, email address not given
Subject: MUTLI-ETHNIC PEOPLE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN HERE
Date: 6/3/99
I get sick of people acting like they are not use to multi-ethni Americans.We have always existed and we always will.I am a very confident person and I love the way the Lord made me and no matter how many ignorent people I come across, they will never make me feel otherwise!I just wanted to share a couple of dumb things us people have to go through.Don't you just hate it when someone walks up to you and say's "What colr is you?"HA HA.And when you tell them they say "No you Aint"Ha.Or what about this one, "What color would you rather be"Ha I believe that topped the stupidity poll.HA HA HA.Here is the final one, "You trying to black."HA HA. How can you try when you are?DAAAAAAAA.Any way enough for the comedy.Mix peeps keep your heads up!
Name: elaine, ebj@internetnorth.com.au
Subject: Response to Patrice's reply
Date: 6/1/99
I agree that genes are a mysterious thing and that complexion is not a determinant of race. I however observe or more correctly it has been my experience that for the large part, irrespective of the origin of the black gene that blackness (be it African, Indian or other) brings people together. I currently live in an Australian town with a visible (I cannot say large) community of native Australians or Aborigines (a large proportion of which are of mixed race), Maoris, Polynesian Islanders and Indonesians. When my father (who is Indian) visited it was amazing the warm reception he was given in public places by these groups of people who by their comments seemed to recognise him as someone with whom they shared something in common. I do not get the same reaction, as I blend into or dare I say it "pass as white". Thanks for your comment Patrice. Kind Regards to you all.
Name: Lisa Mason-Minter, lmi648967@aol.com
Subject: A.D. Powells Response
Date: 5/27/99
I just want to take a moment to defend myself. I do not advocate all bi-racial people to be "white". My journey of self-discovery has brought me to a place in my life where I have consciously made a choice, a decision to be who I have always been. A black woman. Because my mother is white does not mean I have to forever ride the fence. This is my choice, my journey of self discovery. I am not encouraging anybody one way or the other to choose black over white. This is about doing what one can live with. This has been difficult for me, and I am fine with all the decisions I have made for myself. This is also a dilemma that most bi-racial or multi-cultural individuals struggle with. Some struggle all their lives to fit in. I did what was right for me. I am not apologizing. I know where I come from and I know where I'm going. I have never been more sure of it than I am now. Partly because this site has offered me an oppurtunity to explore emotions that had lied dormant for years. For that I am thankful. Secondly, how other cultures may or may not be accepted is not of concern to me at this point in my life. This was about me, not anybody else.
(Moderator's Note: To read A.D. Powell's response and Lisa's previous submission, select the subject above.)
Name: Leighkaren Daniels,
leighkaren@worldnet.att.net
Subject: segregated San Francisco?
Date: 5/27/99
I have been experiencing life in SF for the last 3 months. I am sorry to say that I feel super weird out here.
I live in Marin County, which is a very posh community in Northern Cal, and I'm sorry to say that there seem to be very few Afro-Americans in this area. I ride the ferry across the Bay back and forth, and am always looking for "other." Whenever I see another Afro-American, I try to make some kind of connection with them with my eyes. I guess I am looking for some acknowledegment of fellowship, but it's just not happening. I find myself wondering what and how they are thinking of me. Does this person recognize me as Afro-American (partly) or are they just wondering why I am staring? Unfortunatley, many of the Afro-Americans that I see on the street here I know I would have no chance! at being accepted by. This distresses me mostly because it makes me focus on it, which I don't want to do,and because I don't like having to worry about whether or not I'm coming into contact with too many White people. In New York City, my home, this was never a problem. People on the whole here, do not seem as worldly, and I would have to go to a different city to have a more diverse exposure. I don't want to do this because, unfortunately, it wouldn't be as nice as where I'm living right now. I hate having to think about all this, and I can't help but think that this kind of atmosphere is probably the norm in America, not the exception. Just my NYC naivete, I guess. I probably would have had much more of a problem dealing with my identity in a place like this as opposed to New York, which was hard enough. This makes me concerned for the children I have yet to have, who will be far more mixed than I am.
Name: ginger, email address not given
Subject: blackie's letter
Date: 5/27/99
I am African american as well, but after reading "blackie's" letter and Lisa Minter's response AND after looking at this website for a long time and seeing the kind of treatment a lot of people suffer, (I am often mistaken for biracial)I see the reasons for his opinion, but he has no right to tell people how to identify themselves.
(Moderator's Note: To read Blackie's submission, select "blackie's" above and scroll down to 3/10/99. To read Lisa's response, select Lisa Minter above.)
Name: Hildegarde Zwane, zwane@nwpg.org.za
Subject: Interacial mariage
Date: 5/25/99
I am a white lady calling from the south - South Africa - the land of controversy! I grew up in the most conservative houshold you could imagine. I was always told that whites and blacks could not mix - it is the biggest sine on this earth! I, however, was more curious as to whether this was true. Since my very fisrt boyfriend - all of them was black - I never had a white boyfriend. Obviously, all of them was also a secret, because it was in the then apartheid system and one was not allowed to have an interacial relationship - you could have been locked up for it - honestly! I was always very discreet - meeting in secret - but since the elections in 1994 I am free to do my will. I got married in 1995 to a beautiful black zulu man an we are still together and God still did not kill me - as I was told! I am the most happiets person on this planet - I have got a wonderful marriage and a very good lover. I will never regret that I got married to a black man! It is though very difficult for my parents to accepts - but they are coming around, slowly but certainly. Howver, interacial marriage is not THAT easy - it needs a lot of compromise. Do it - and you will succeed. Enjoy your relationship and do not let anyone tell you different - in front of God, we are all human beings, coming from the Almighty - if black (or any other race) did not come from God - where do they come from? BUT they were made by God - therfore nothing, absolutely nothing is wrong with them! Peace to all interacial couples in this world and enjoy it!
Name: Chandler, chandlerev@aol.com
Subject: Personal Story
Date: 5/21/99
For two years I¹ve thought about writing my own personal story so that I could submit it and become a member of ³Myshoes.² And for two years I¹ve ghosted in and out of this site, reading discussion topics, checking out new member¹s stories, and all the while empathizing deeply with everything that has been expressed and shared. This time, once again, inspired by all your writings, I¹m trying to catch myself before I come up with another excuse to procrastinate. This time, before I slip back between the cracks of ethnic obscurity, I want to say hello to my brothers and sisters and I want to shine the spotlight over here, just enough, so that I might be revealed for a moment and share my story with you as you have so generously done with me.
(Moderator's Note: You can read Chandler's story by selecting his name above.)
Name: George Hageman, ghageman@hisd.harris.com
Subject: This site is looking very nice.
Date: 5/21/99
You are doing a very fine job on this site. It looks real good, and I love you more for working on it so "consistently".
Keep up the good work.
(Moderator's Note: Thank you my sweet husband.)
Name: Sandra Bishop, SandyBisho@aol.com
Subject: I owe it all to My Shoes
Date: 5/20/99
Juanita Brooks, I am getting married next year, (June 3, 2000) and I owe it all to you and your website, "My Shoes"!
One day last year while at work, I was complaining to a co-worker about a lack of decent men. (I was in a man-hating mood). I was 34, never-married, and had had a number of disappointing experiences, most of them racially attributable. My co-worker asked me if I had ever tried singles ads? My response was, "If they prefer a black woman, they don't mean me, and if they prefer a white woman, they don't mean me, either." After listening to my story she informed me she had been surfing the web one day and had stumbled upon My Shoes (she is white) and thought I might find it interesting. That evening after work I logged on to your website and found a whole world of people I identified with. Needless to say, my life changed forever!
As I began scanning the lives in the stories presented before me, I felt an instant kinship with these people; nodding in understanding of their trials and tribulations; scowling in anger upon reading their dilemmas; saddened and disappointed when learning about their issues of unacceptance and disregard, and laughing out loud at the ignorance of people resulting from some of their situations.
One letter in particular made an impact upon me; the letter of a young man named Henry Norcom. His experiences and my experiences were shared, his strength and intelligence a reflection of my own soul. Excitedly I wrote to him, expressing my discontent; a lifetime of pain and anger, full to overflowing. Who was I angry with? Myself, for letting white men leave me empty. Myself, for letting the few good black men I had dated slip through my fingers. Myself, for not knowing or understanding myself enough to distinguish between the good and the bad, regardless of color.
The next morning I came to work, and found a letter awaiting me. To my surprise our correspondence took on a life of its own, letters flowing three and four times a day, my new friend making me laugh and cry as we dissected the intricate details of our lives, piece by piece. Two weeks later we exchanged photographs; three months later we met. The holidays have been a blur, meeting family members and friends, taking vacations together, griping about work and school...you know, the regular stuff.
Today I wear an engagement ring. It has been nearly a year since that first conversation began. Our relationship was established on a common ground. Our color never being an issue, we concentrated on other things we deemed important; morals, values, respect and shared interests. I consider My Shoes to be an extended family, and I hope they do not give up or give in to the despair we all share from time to time as a result of our unique situation. As our world continues to become more and more multi-racial, it is my hope people will learn we are all more alike than different, love and acceptance being the desires we all embrace.
(Moderator's Note: Congratulations Henry and Sandy. Connection is what we are all about!)
Name: Daniel C. Bobbitt, goofydb@hotmail.com
Subject: RACIAL IDENTITY
Date: 5/19/99
MY WIFE IS PREGNANT WITH OUR CHILD, BUT I AM WONDERING WHAT TO IDENTIFY MY CHILD AS. MY MOTHER IS WHITE, MY FATHER IS BLACK, MY WIFE IS WHITE, AND I LOOK AS THOUFH I AM OF LATINO DESENT. I KNOW THERE IS NO TELLING ON WHAT OUR BABY'S SKIN COLOR WILL TURN OUT TO BE, BUT WHAT DO I CLASSIFY HER AS ON HER BIRTH CERTIFICATE? I AM CLASSIFIED AS BLACK, BUT I LOOK NOTHING LIKE A "REAL" BLACK PERSON DOES, I DON'T WANT MY CHILD TO GO THROUGH AN CONFUSION ABOUT HER RACIAL IDENTITY. MAYBE, I WILL PUT PURPLE, THAT IS MY FAVORITE COLOR. WHY DOES SOCIETY, INCLUDING MYSELF, FOCUS SO MUCH ON COLOR, WHEN WE COULD FOCUS ON BEING HAPPY? IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE, DOES IT?
Name: Daniel C. Bobbitt, goofydb@hotmail.com
Subject: The identity of my unborn child
Date: 5/19/99
My mother is white, my father is black, my wife is white, and I look like I am hispanic. I am 19, and have been teased and harrassed all of my short life. I grew up in a majority white town, with my mother and my step-father (who is white also). I want desperatly want to identify myself as black, but most of the black people I have met do not accept me as such. All of the white people I have met, do not accept me as being white. I am disclosing this information because I don't want my problems about my race to affect my child. My baby is still in the womb, so I can't see the color. Whatever the color of my child is, what race do I identify my child as? I do not want to deny my child her background, nor do I want to cause her confusion. If anyone has any ideas, I would greatly appreciate it.
Name: Wyatt and Kim Martin, y8andme@pacbell.net
Subject: Wyatt's (4 1/2 yrs old) Story
Date: 5/18/99
Hi. I'm Wyatt's mom, Kim and this is his story. He's my angel. Born to me, single mom, a week before my 25th birthday. I thought for sure I'd have a little caramel-colored child, yet to my surprise and delight, I gave birth to this beautiful baby boy. He has undergone many physical changes since his birth, He started out with straight, brown hair which fell out at 5 months and in grew these curly, blonde tufts! I stayed home for 18 months with him. Then I decided to go back to my job, teaching preschool. Naturally, I took Wyatt with me! He and I were in the "Toddler Room" together. When he turned 2, I moved over to teach in that classroom. When he turned 3, I moved over to teach in there. Now, he is 4 1/2 and I am staff supervisor at the Kindergarten where he will be this October.
Many of the parents still cannot believe he belongs to me. I got many questions and unwanted stares when I was breast-feeding him. Folks would walk by us and see his llittle pink toes or arms sticking out from the blanket and would gasp, as if to say, "Why is that black lady nursing that white baby?" I would laugh and continue.
Wyatt and I live with my mom, who is also mixed race. Her mother (Wyatt's great-grandmother) looks exactly like Wyatt, with blonde curls and green eyes (Wyatt has blue eyes). So I do know that I have these "lighter" genes in me somewhere! I am so proud of the mixture of races that has occured within my family. My brother has a mixed-race child also. Wyatt is exposed to so many different lifestyles and colors, he's sure to be a well-rounded, cultured young man someday! So, everyday I pray God will give me strength to raise Wyatt up to be loving, caring and respectful to others. That is all I can ask.
I started a club in Yahoo for parents of mixed race children and it has taken off! So far, we have over 60 members who actively participate in discussinons. I am happy to say that one member listed this site in the links section, and this is how I found you! Please stop by and take a look at the club. http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/parentingmixedracechildren I also have a web page with the pics of the club members and their children. http://members.xoom.com/SpaceQT/clubpix.htm
Name: cee-cee, email address not given
Subject: Looks
Date: 5/18/99
Not long ago , I was looking at the show "VIP" with my mother and eldest brother. As I watched the show, I commented to my mother that it amazed me just how many men oogle over the star ( in spite of most of her physical attributes being phony and altered ). Then my mother commented because she is a blond and unfortunately , not herself. Seemingly throughout the world White, Black , Latino/Latin ( look at what her male fans did when she went to South America )the women is some sort of a vixen to them. After I finished watching the show, I told my mother that I once envied White women in one way and then she asked me how ? I told her that seemingly they, especially if they are an attractive Blonde, does not have as a hard time getting any man of any race, like minority, especially Black women do. I continued to think about this and asked myself " I wonder what would it be like if I was a " blonde" ? Although , I'm not stupid to believe that stereotype about Blondes ( e.g. dingy, easy ), I wonder just how much atention I would get if I was one. Besides my thoughts of blondes, I also thought about the love that I grew to have for Being Black. Years back, I did not embrace my Blackness because some of my relatives and members of the Black community ( weirdly, the White people that I encountered did not do it , I guess because , if they do, by us Blacks it's considered to be racist ) made it sound that it is the worst race to be. If my hair grew so-called nappy ( can't we find another word than nappy ? )I dreaded going to school in fear that my classmates would jeer and taunt me as they did in the past, most of the Black women who talked among themselves said that if they have a child , they wanted their children to have " good" hair and lighter skin . Although you would hear many of us Black folk preach self-love through such statement like " BLack is beautiful " or " the " Blacker the berry the sweeter the juice ", it did not mean anything to me. I thought that if you love yourself, why are you downing the very things that made us special and unique ? They'll bring up " well it was part of our ancestory ". Maybe our history do play a role in how we treat each other, but it does not mean I had to continue the horrendous legacy. For 10 years of ny Black life , I endured looking men saying they loved Black women although the color of the Black women they have in their arms resembles Mariah Carey and I thought that to be loved by a Black man or any man I would have to look like that( That is one thing that I don't get about ER actor Eriq LaSalle: though he quit playing his role in an interacial scene because he felt that he was disrespecting Black women, when I first looked at his wife I thought that she was White ). I love diversity and eventually I began to see beauty in a whole range: You got people like Tony Braxton ( or Halle Berry ) that short hair is attractive, Tyra Banks to show us that darker skin can be sexy ( a lot of men oogle her as well ). The problem with some people is that they do not carefully look or examine that person . They only look at the color or the features of that person but never think about of what makes that so-called incongruent feature unique on them. Just like I say there is good and evil in each race there is ugly and pretty in it also.
Name: A.D. Powell, powell@danenet.wicip.org
Subject: Lisa Mason-Minter's Comments
Date: 5/14/99
I thoroughly disagree with Lisa Mason-Minter's advocacy of "black" identity for persons who are physically "white" or "caucasian." I am strongly in favor of openly proclaiming a WHITE identity because: 1) It suits us far better than "black," 2) A "black" identity is based on the racist premise that "miscegenation" somehow "improves" the "black" group and "degrades" the "white" group; if you don't agree that your European ancestry is too good for you, you should reject the false "black" identity. You don't see Jews being dumb enough to call themselves "non-Aryan," do you? 3) Contrary to "black" efforts to use other "whites" as bogeymen to frighten "white sheep" into the "black" fold, Latinos, Arabs, North Africans and others openly spread "Negro blood" throughout the "white" population, and you don't see them being thrown in jail for it, do you? "White" is more "multiracial" than "black." Most of your fellow "whites" aren't concerned about racial "purity." For more information, see my essays:
http://www.webcom.com/intvoice/powell4.html http://www.webcom.com/intvoice/powell6.html http://www.webcom.com/intvoice/powell8.html http://www.webcom.com/intvoice/powell9.html
Name: Patrice
Farmer, patricelfarmer@hotmail.com
Subject: Elaine's Comment
Date: 5/13/99
My brother is half Hindu. He looked very East Indian as a child, but now he looks either mixed or just a brownish skinned black with nice hair. His daughter, whose mother is black, came out looking east Indian with straight East Indian hair and looks. My present guy-friend is East Indian, and he couldn't believe how strong the genes were in my niece. Her sister doesn't look like her, she looks more like my mother, her mother, and my brother combined. I had another boy friend who was East Indian. His kids and my niece were standing together, and everyone would tell him how beautiful all of his children were. Genes are funny, you know. Oh, by the way, I have heard black people comment that Indians were black too. I disagree. Skin color is no determinant of ethnicity and culture, or even race!
Name: Elaine,
ebj@internetnorth.com.au
Subject: Funny experience
Date: 5/11/99
I had a funny experience at work lately. I was speaking to one of my colleagues about my relatives in Cananda. When he asked if they were Irish (my mother is Irish) I said no they were Indian (from India). He nearly fell off his chair. He exclaimed "but Indians are black". I said "just wait one minute" as I fished out a family photograph out of my bag with my rather "black" father featuring prominently. I have known this guy for about 4 years. I thought to myself, he must be either incredibly naive (I have a distinctively identifiable Indian family name) or else it simply never crossed his mind because I was just Elaine to him. How nice I thought and I still think.
Name: Erika Valentin (formerlyMoreno-Dalton),
erika.valentin@worldnet.att.net
Subject: To complicate issues...
Date: 5/8/99
Well, it has been a really long time for me. I have been so busy that I almost forgot that I was a member of this site. So, to those I haven't meet hello. Since, the last time I was here I have gotten married. (Gosh, long time Nove. 97) Well, my husband is a Puerto Rican of African ancestry. You know how they do us Latinos to make things easy...dump us into one pile even though I'm white as snow and he as toffee as a tootsie roll. :-)
Well, this is what happened that kind of got to me. The other week we had a little spat and he wouldn't let me in my apartment. Instead of busting the door down, I called the sheriff's office to come make him let me in. (BTW, everything is ok now) Well, when they were asking for a description, they asked me is he black,white, or hispanic. I said both black and hispanic. Which is true. He looks "black", but is totally latin. Thick accent, salsero, arroz con pollo y todo. Well, then the dispatcher said which one does he look more like?? I was flabbergasted. My first question what does a "hispanic" look like?? I'm so called "hispanic" so is he. We are on totally opposite ends of the color spectrum. Do they think "hispanic" is the gray shade between black and white?? What about asians?? and other ethnic groups?? Anyway, to make this lady happy, I had to say black. Which is a half truth. Well, now that I've vented and gotten that out of my system, thanks for listening.
Name: Lisa Mason-Minter,
LMi648967@aol.com
Subject: Blackie's Letter
Date: 5/8/99
I read Blackie's letter a third time because I really want to understand where he is coming from. And I do. He is not being a racist. He is a survivor. Blacks have been accosted in this country for centuries. It is natural for the Black community to still have feelings of divisiveness. We as a "mixed" race shoud know all to well, his emotion. I agree with him that a box on census forms labeled "bi-racial or multi-cultural" is too broad. If that does happen there will be much needed money pulled from the African-American community. Politicians have been discussing this for years. I have 4 black children, I want them to receive equal treatment and I also want them to have the same opportunities as whites in this country. Black people only make up 11% of the population in America. If we all check this new box this will decrease the amount of monies going into funds that benefit the Black community. I will not check the "bi-racial" box for political reasons. I also believe that Affirmative Action should never be abolished. I have been "given" too many jobs because of the lightness of my skin. It is not fair, I did not take any of those jobs because of a little thing called pride. It's not about being racist or taking advantage, it's about pride and self-love and taking care of those who have taken care of you. Racism is alive and well in this country, it will never end. We all would be better off if we face it head-on instead of trying to create a new race. It won't happen. There are too many in power who will not allow it.
(Moderator's Note: To read Blackie's submission, select "Blackie's Letter" in the subject above and scroll down to 3/10/99.)
Name: Lisa
Mason-Minter,
LMi648967@aol.com
Subject: My Identity
Date: 5/8/99
The last few weeks have been kind of a learning experience for me. I had the opportunity to sit down with two girlfriends during lunch and they asked me how my internet experience was going. One has a computer and doesn't really use it and wanted to know what's out here. Anyway, I mentioned this site to her and we began talking about my situation. My girlfriends are black and one is very light as well, just a few shades darker than myself, and during our discussion I realized that these two "sistuhs" really are my sisters. I have encountered the same racisms they have and more. I realized that my experiences as a black woman with obvious white blood has made me the target of some very nasty racists. I realized that blackness is more a state of mind than color of skin. When I am in the company of white people I am comfortable but not as comfortable as I am with my own. And I say my own, because they know my heart, they have taken the time to know me and love me. I have beautiful, African-American sisters. It used to bother me that I'm not darker. But having lunch the other day, I realized that I am as dark as I'm gonna get and I'm alright just like I am. I wouldnt change one red (okay, brown) hair on my lily white head. I am refusing to ride that fence anymore and claim a white race that has shunned me for decades. White people recognize my blackness right away, the way I talk, the way I express myself. Why didn't I recognize it before? I was too busy trying to fit in and I didn't realize that I already do. This has been an amazing journey to self-discovery for me. It will not be smooth traveling for me now by any means, my mother is white, and she feels I abandoned the race a long time ago. But my journey will be safer emotionally because I now know the path I want to follow. Some will say that I am a sell-out. And my answer is this: One cannot "sail out" of something one was never in. I have never been "white". It took me 36 years to get here, but I like it. Life has been confusing at best, and I finally found the answer for me
Name: Juanita Brooks, jbrooks@myshoes.com
Subject: Discussion Group Section of My Shoes
Date: 5/7/99
Participation in the Discussion Group at this web site is reserved for members of the My Shoes Support Group. Members are encouraged to discuss their personal experiences related to each topic.
Non-members can participate in the Letters To The Group and the Bulletin Board sections. Submissions to a Discussion Topic by non-members will not be posted.
Name: Justin Vegge, VEG2MT@juno.com
Subject: Bi-racial children
Date: 5/6/99
I am doing a project on bi-racial children and the issues they must go through for my Adolescent Development class. If anyone has any information or stories about themselves or others in a bi-racial family, I would be most eager to listen and to learn about your experiences. I am white and grew up in the midwest with hardly any contact with other races, so please help me so that I may learn.
Name: cee-cee, email address not given
Subject: Hair & Looks
Date: 4/29/99
Rather ignorant of the woman isn't it? Pat ? What the lady fail to realize is that there is a difference between having corse hair and having curly hair. A person can have curly hair but also straight moist-like hair but if you have course Black hair, it will not be as moist as the wavy hair. My sister once told me about her ex-boyfriend's white sister in law and the color of their son . The husband is a medium complexioned ( honey brown ) Black man and the wife is White. Their seven year old son is looks like a White boy with his very light skin, striaght thin hair and geryish colored eyes. When the child was born and when she grew older, she commented that she was suprised that her son did not look " Black ". My sister said that maybe he did not because she is White and he is a lighter skinned Black man. It seems that When it somes to Black/White children people seem to worry about how dark or the hair texture of their children but think about these things 1 ) I have see interracial children that awere non black ( in this case , White and asian Indian ) they had two children who were brown skinned 2 ) Junior Seau , of the San Diego charagers is not classified as Black but is of Polynesian descent: when I look at him he look like a light skinned Balck man becase of his hair and his slightly broad nose. look at the terroist Osana bin-laden ( the man accused of blowing up an embassy in Kenya )though he is classifed as an arab, he has course like hair and olive-complexioned skin. I even have a friend who have two ordinary looking white parents but he came out with the appearance of a Latino man Why is this ? his great-great great-great great-grand father was Native American. So to those who think that darker features and course hair is only a Black thing think again.
(Moderator's Note: To read Pat's submission, select "Pat" in the body of the text above and scroll down to 4/26/99.)
Name: Renee, Renee_Prevost@hotmail.com
Subject: Blackie's
Letter
Date: 4/27/99
I am Sick AND TIRED of cowardly "black" identified types like BLACKIE pathetic whining about why we multiracials (those of us are unfortunated to "tainted" with the "tarbrush") shouldn't identified as "biracial" or that "godlike" appellation (if one listens to the anti-"passing" raving of the "black" identified) "white" because of couple of racist who identify as "white". If BLACKIE and cowardly his ILK are so determine to put "tarbrushed" whites and multiracials in the "black" fold then he better tell Latinos that they are "black." I notice that these "one drop" cowards of the likes BLACKIE and his ILK are afraid to offend Latinos by citing THEIR African ancestry and claiming THEM as members of the "black race."
(Moderator's Note: To read Blackie's submission, select "Blackie's Letter" in the subject above and scroll down to 3/10/99.)
Name: cee-cee, email address not given
Subject: not all biracial people disregard their culture.....
Date: 4/27/99
Blackie, Although I respect your views about how biracial people should be classified, I will have to disagree with you about what you said. Why do Black people Asians people and White people can have their own categories but the biracial people cannot ? Just because one may want to say their Black and White , or Asian or Latino etc, does not mean they are forgetting where they are coming from. They may do it because for the love and respect for their parents. I have an African ( Nigerian born ) boyfriend and do you want to know something interesting about what some of his countrymen feel about our racial classification? though my boyfriend loves for us to call ourselves such, some of them feel that we African-Americans are " watered down " ( not being African enough for them inspite of " black " we are ). There are just as many so-called one hundered percent Black people who disrespect their culture as there are many bi-racial people who are very proud of who they are. For almost twenty three of my twenty nine years of my young life, I struggled loving my Blackness, not because some racist white person telling me that Black is wrong but from MY OWN 100% people. If I have nappy hair , I was the talk of the town , or everytime a child in my family is born the first thing they asked were " is he/she is light "? What kind of pride is that ? It's not what you call yourself that make who your are, it's how you feel about yourself , your people and your community that make you whole. I got a question for you, actress Halle Berry as you know is bi-racial. Though she identifies herself as " black ", truthfully she is not. Do you call her proud or do you think that she is disregarding her White mother, who raised her ?
(Moderator's Note: To read Blackie's submission, select blackie in the body of the text above and scroll down to 3/10/99.)
Name: holly ryan, hcryan@yahoo.com
Date: 4/2499
Subject: Support
Reading the letters of interracial couples has supported me in many ways. I support your website and I am glad to see that there is help for people when society "shuts them out" Thanks!
Name: Lisa Minter, LMi648967@aol.com
Subject: Finally!
Date: 4/24/99
I finally found a website that is meant just for me. Life has been a struggle, looking white and "being" black. I am a 35 year old woman still fighting the demons of racism. My life has been difficult at best trying to fit-in in a world that has no room for me. My mother feels as if I have betrayed her and she never should have been with my father, a black man. It hurts to hear her say that. I know she only wants the best for me and my siblings. But I feel she needs to try to understand how I feel. I did not create this situation for myself. I have felt like I have been walking around in a vacuum for the past year or so. I know that my spirit is seeking peace. I need to come to grips with my past and my heritage. Most times I am the only "mixed" person in a group. I have to fit in somewhere. It is not in my nature to be the lone ranger. I can't forever ride the fence. My spirit is not at ease there. I am hoping that I will begin to find peace here, on this site. You all have shared my innermost thoughts and I am connecting to so many of you. Life is hard for my children as well. My husband is a dark-skinned black man but 2 of my children are fair skinned like myself and have "good" hair. I hate that term, for what is "bad" hair? I need to raise my children with pride. I need all my children to understand how it feels to be one thing and look like another. I want them all to understand how unique and special we are, even if society does not appreciate who we are. We are no longer "mulattos". We are choices. We are no longer by-products of rape, but of mutual love between two races. My struggle has been hard. My childhood has many terrible memories of hair being pulled and knocked down the stairs in school hallways. I was always taunted because of my blue eyes and light brown hair and my almond toned skin. It's funny that the very children, who were black, have grown up and the black race is where I exist. My life has very little white association in it, save for my co-workers. I never fit in with my mother's family. They would tell us to keep quiet about our home life, didn't want their neighbors to know how black we really were. I was always told by them how exotic I looked. They never bothered to know "me." Anyway, thanks for this site. I feel like I'm home. I didn't want to just focus on the black sites, I want my internet experience to be for my self-empowerment and I believe that this will be beneficial to myself and my whole family. And thanks for letting me vent, I haven't thought about some of these things in a long time.
Name: Kim, Kabagat@aol.com
Subject: To blackie
Date: 4/22/99
I really enjoyed reading your comments and agree.
(Moderator's Note: To read Blackie's submission, select blackie in the subject above and scroll down to 3/10/99.)
Name: PROUD TO BE WHAT I AM, email address not given
Subject: WHY NOT
Date: 4/22/99
I am responding to WHY I am multiracial and proud of it, enjoyed reading the postings and THANK the author of this site for putting it together. This is just another vehicle through which we can express ourselves and how we feel about what we have been exposed to as mixed race individuals. The majority of the people I have read about are happy, healthy, successful individuals and proud of their heritages. What benefit do people get out of putting people down for expressing their feelings. This is how we feel, what we have experienced...and the best thing about it is that we can share it and get some positive insight from others who may have had similar experiences. I also don't think the letters written exude unacceptable behavior. Maybe it is you who is unhappy.
This letter addresses IGNORE THEM!!!!!! I am not sure if you are biracial/multiracial and have had to deal with the constant inquiries about your race, however, ignoring it is easier said than done. Again, people are expressing how they feel and if you haven't walked 100 miles in someone elses shoes, you really can't relate.
Name: Monica Suarez, Suarez@sonoma.edu
Subject: Writing a paper for a class...
Date: 4/21/99
I am a student at Sonoma State University and I am writing a paper for a class on the topic of growing up biracial. I myself am biracial, but look and categorized as white by the rest of society. I would love to ask anyone who is interested in participating, a few questions about your life. With this paper I am going to attempt to report how society has changed in regards to dealing with people from mixed backgrounds. I am hoping to uncover any type of trends that are there, and I want to accomplish this by getting first hand accounts from people. If you are interested in being interviewed for this, please email me. Thank you.
Name: Leighkaren Daniels,
leighkaren@worldnet.att.net
Subject: reply to Eterro globelife@yahoo.com
Date: 4/17/99
Hi,
This is regarding your email written to My Shoes. I can understand your anger but I really think you're venting it in the wrong place and blaming the wrong people, namely, the members of this site. If you have grown up in America, you must know that those of biracial descent who subscribe to this site have not asked to have problems adjusting. No one likes it. But in this country, with the legacy of "otherness" that so many share, it is not ourselves who push us into a corner, but this society that was based on labeling. I have to tell you that on many occasions in my life, it was not the Whites who gave me a hard time about "what I was" but the Blacks. I think you have no idea what you are talking about when you say we have a problem accepting our :Blackness!" We wern't BORN with these issues! Many people of the Black community have a problem accepting our "Blackness" because of their issues about color and their issues about self-hatred. I am not saying that our problems are all the fault of someone esle, BUT there are 2 sides to every story. There is a HUGE amount of self-hatred in the Black community!
I happen to be very proud of the fact that I have such a rich cultural heritage, and the journey to be more well-adjusted has made me a better, more self-assured person. I love the fact that I have had ancestors who helped to make this country what it is, as well as those who were a part of the Old World. Just because the members of this site are honest about asking questions of ourselves does not make us "screwed up people." Remember, don't judge someone until you have walked a mile in "their shoes."
Name: Sandy, tschmid@ix.netcom.com
Subject: Dauther's Interracial Relationship
Date: 4/15/99
My daughter (white) is engaged to be married in December to a wonderful man (black). My husband is having a difficult time dealing with this, not because he doesn't like the man, but because of the children and what they may have to endure being biracial. This site has helped me tremendously and I hope that he will read some of the letters many of you have shared. I do think there are things we all face in life but the main thing is that if children are raised in a loving family and given security and a good sense of self worth, they will survive and flourish as well-adjusted people. I would appreciate any comments.
Name: Imelda, IBurnette@AOL.com
Subject: Racial Identity
Date: 4/14/99
I am Asian and my husband is Black. My husband insists that our child is black because the law states so. I have been trying to research as to what law states how a biracial child should be qualified but have not come up with anything. The people at my job says that once a biracial child is born, the race of the mother is carried on as the race of the child. I need some articles to prove or discredit them and to appease my mind of this dillema.
Name: Cee-Cee, email address not given
Subject: Personal Story
Date: 4/14/99
After viweing the latest story from Mr. Eterro Barton, I felt compelled to write . I was born and raised In Decatur, Georgia ( at least 7-10m miles outside of Atlanta ) . I was also raised in a racially mixed neighborhood. As a child , I remembered having a crush on Greek Latino men. I thought that Shawn Cassidy and Donnie Osmond was ( and in Donnie's case still is .. ) " da" bomb. I never had any racial problems with my White neighbors. Before my mother discussed race or racism with me , I did not know what either was . I did not call people Black or White. If I described them , I referred to them as " light-skinned ", " darker skinned " " or slanted eyes ". I remembered going to a neigborhood grocery store , where I saw a young couple: The husband was White,the wife was a darker skinned Cambodian woman. The wife was a honey brown complexion and when I seen her I told my mother that " she is the same color as me!! ). I first learned about race when I was four years old. My older brother becamse confused about his racially identity because just like me, he did not describe race , only skin color. In his case, he was very fair skinned, so he thought that since he " looked " white " like our two White friend, he must also be the same. Then my mother began to discuss the constitution of Blackness: hair, skin type and ancestory were some of the things my mom discussed with us. Just like my brother thought that he was White, I thought that I was a Latino ( Mexican ) because like the honey complexioned Cambodian woman I saw in the store, my Mexican friend was also the same color. Since then, I have been evaluating the terminology of what race is because the classifications can be senseless. I look at people from Various races and ask" How can so and so be from this race when he don't look it" . There are Arabs , Latinos, Indians ( Asian and Native American ) who have distinct Black features about them but they are never calssified as " Black ", but a person who have one-eighth of Black ancestory and in spite of techinically being White are not " white ". In the days of Slavery, the slavemaster used it to disticnt the slavemaster, the slaves and to keep from being related to them. I do relate to Mr. Barton of his disgust with the negativity of how Blackness is being portrayed. I once saw a Bi-racial girl on the Montel Williams show and dhe just disgusted me to the utmost. My problem with her was no so much of how she identified herself ( White instead of Black or Bi-racial ) but the toll that it was taking on her Black father: he almost cried because of her selfishness!. When montel questioned her about why she did that she said that she suffered so much being Black. Weirdly what she did not observe was that SHE was enduring the same pain that she said she suffered being called Black or Bi-racial. One of her so called White friends referred to BLack people as "nigger" , her White mother in law did not approve her relationship with her son when she found out that she was mixed and the husband himself , who previously date Mexican women, thought that she was also Mexican--in other words he did not date her as her Bi-racial self, but her appearnce of a Mexican woman ( which to me is no different from dating a bi-racial woman because they are both minorities ) . I do not see how someone can say they will suffer if they call themselves Black when they are going thriugh life hiding and not accepting who they truly are. Sure, as long as we are minorities, we will be subjected to racism and even there are Whites who experience the same thing , but I would rather be honest with who I'am ( Multiracial or Black as I call my self ) than to hide to please people who may or may not judge me for my race.
Name: holly ryan, hcryan@yahoo.com
Date: 4/13/99
Subject: choosing your partner
I am a African American girl who grew up in a predomint white neighborhood. I think this has taken an effect on me since I mainly like to date white guys or other men outside of my African American race. I have dated only 3 black men which of 2 were "light-skinned" and 1 "dark-skinned". Black Men just don't interest me in the same way as white or other ethnic men do because my desire is to marry outside my race. I also feel that society makes one feel that white is good and black is bad. Moreover, when I have my children I don't what them to go through the same things I went through as a child; being the only black child in the classroom of about 20 students, so I prefer my kids to be white because I believe they will have better opportunities if they are of a "lighter shade". As people we cannot choose who we fall in love with, it just tends to happen. YOU go by the qualities a person has and not the color of their skin or background. One can say I will never date this guy or that certain race but that would be their own personal preference and how they were raised to react around different cultures as a child. People will also look and stare because if it is not "normal" to the public eye we as a society have do critize or make judgements about it. I don't think this issue will never end but I do believe my generation will have better outlook on it than the baby boomers or past generations since we are more "open-minded". In the end "CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG".
Name: Glenda, glndawtch
Subject: My Daughter
Date: 4/12/99
I am a white mother of a child whose father is black. We are divorced and he has no visitation rights due to mental illness. I have always told my daughter (who is 6 yrs) that she is biracial, and I even had that put on her birth certificate as such. In the state in which we live you are either black or caucasion. I have also told her that she is the best of both worlds. She tends to identify with whites more than blacks due to the fact that she has little contact with her father's family. I'm not sure if that's healthy for her, but she seems to be well adjusted. She has many friends of all colors and races, and she has yet to question any differences. Even though we live in a mostly white community, I have not had any racial problems despite thoughts to the contrary. I have and am currently doing research on the subject, and am looking for more information about biracial children in foster care and what type of placement is considered for them. If anyone has anything to offer, it would be appreciated, even your comments.
(Moderator's Note: Glenda, your email address is incomplete. Please send a correct one to me: jbrooks@myshoes.com.)
Name: Patrice Farmer, patricelfarmer@hotmail.com
Subject: Cruel Email sent to me
Date: 4/12/99
I posted a couple of months ago about not finding anyone who accepts me or my duaghter. Today, I checked my email and found a very disturbing message that had to come from my post from a Marcus Edwin Barton at marcus.barton@eds.com:
"You seem to be a person who shuns what you are. You don't date black because you think you are too good for blacks? You are attracted to what you find attractive and they find you distasteful! Maybe you need to take a closer look at yourself and figure out what you are doing wrong or maybe you just need to move to a place hwere the people are more culturally diverse."
I'm not sure of his intent, but I don't see it as being very positive. You can email it to the other My Shoes members if you like. To see if they've gotten similiar emails. Thank You. ANd thanks for your forum!!!!
(Moderator's Note: To read Patrice's submission, select "posted a couple months ago" above and scroll down to 2/5/99. There are two submissions by her on the same date.)
Name: Linda West, venuslw@yahoo.com
Subject: dating abd relationships
Date: 4/12/99
I am a bi-racial woman and my story is posted on this web site. I would like to know if anyone would be interested in an on-line dating service that caters to bi-racial people who look white, multi-racial and multicultural? I am very interested in your feeling towards this concept. If so please e-mail me.
Thank you for your comments.
Name: Carolyn Hall, chall@english.fsu.edu
Subject: ignorant people
Date: 4/12/99
I think it's great for those who have "found" themselves! I think it's stupid and ver ignorant for people to write sarcastic remarks simply because they have already come to a point in his or her life where "race" is no longer an issure. And if anyone thinks that "race" is no longer an issue, then he or she needs to get a reality check. If one person is mixed, biracial, tri-racial, or what ever, they have a lot to deal with. If a person has the apperance of looking White, it is still not easy. What do you do when everyone in your office thinks you're White, and another White co-worker makes an ethinic joke? It's not how we want to be seen, but how everyone else sees us. Instead of being bitter and hateful, why not contact that person whose story rubbed you the wrong way and help them to your level. Making rude remarks does bring them up at all. True, some of us have had hard lives, and I'm sure each person feels that his/her story might be worse, but don't make fun of it. And if you don't like this site, why not just stay away from it? Obviously something here keeps you interested enough to read everyone's story. What a shame, but it's people like that who keep the "race" issue a problem. Just because you're satisfied with the way your life is, don't force feed it to the next person. True, in most countries, you are that "nationality" not the color, but HERE in America, things are different. Because of the bad rap that Black people have been given, look at all the way all new immigrants treat and look at Black people. Now, just because I've made that point doesn't mean that I've picked the easier way in life and claim to be White. White people do not accept me and neither do Black people. I think the point here is that most of us just want to find other people who are like us. Don't place me in the categorey of Black because my husband is Black. I've been out in public with my husband where Black people have been flat out rude towards us. No matter how much Black I have in me, Black people don't consider me Black, which is fine with me. This also doesn't mean that I consider myself as White. White people give me the evil eye when I walk into a department store as if I'm going to steal something! I want to belong with people who are just like me and view themselves the same way that I view myself. And if anyone has a problem with that, well that's just too bad!
Name: Claudia Neely, neelycs@aol.com
Subject: multiracial people?
Date: 4/8/99
I am triracial, appear white or Jewish, and have tri- and quad-racial children.
Are we allowed to participate/join the forum?
If yes, please send more info!
thanks; I enjoy this site immensely
(Moderator's Note: Anyone who comes from a heritage of more than one race and believes that they appear white in looks or behaviors would fit the description of the My Shoes support group.)
Name: Eterro,
globelife@yahoo.com
Subject: WHY
Date: 4/8/99
To the Site Admin & her readers. I stayed away from this site for so long because alot of the postings were just utterly ridiculous! I am so saddened by the amount of people who can't identify with themselves & for those who know it's easier to choose thier lighter side because it brings them more acceptance or makes them "more desirable". It's never a real issue unless the person or persons are mixed with blodd of persons of AFRICAN DECENT! It's alright to be Asian & white. It's perfectly alright to be mixed with LATINO & white, & oh by the way there are millions of HISPANICS that are black! But in our society & throughout the Western World we cringe at the thought of exspressing to others our mixed black heritage!
Have we (blacks) become so oppressed by those of other races that we turn on ourselves? Here we are facing a new MILLENIUM & people are still troubled when it comes to accepting thier BLACKNESS! I read a young woman's comment about blacks only accepting your racially mixed makeup if you renounce your white genes & claim only black, or if your skin is dark enough or if your hair is kinky enough or straight enough? Isn't it just the same for you to try to break into the white community? Only the criteria is flipped? Otherwise you wouldn't have married a white man or woman. Some shun one race all together. Never even acknowledging thier other family members, never even so much as a glance.
In my mother's country (CUBA) You are CUBAN no matter your complexion. Theres no distinction of who's mixed with black or white or whatever race you may have on your blood! It's the same in Puerto Rico, Aruba, Costa Rica, I could go on & on of the different places this exists. But here in AMERICA it has to be pushed on us all the time to choose one or the other or make up a new category to call ourselves biracial!
If an African American marries a Jamaican, does this make thier child biracial? Lets say an African American & a Black Puerto Rican. Does this make the child biracial? Or lets say an African American & an African (pick the country) Is this child also Biracial?? If we go by what American society says then we should also claim this child biracial. Why? Because an African American is not African, so shouldn't we also consider the children who are African American & Sudanese, which is an African country bi-racial? Or African Amercian & a Somalian bi-racial? Why is it just so much easier for us to categorize when it's simply black & white? I have so many biracial people in my family. All around me there are racially mixed children. Nieces, Nephews & Cousins. I pray that they don't go throuh what I went through & I also pray that thier parents don't subject them to the type of behaviour that you people exude, because from your writings it seems that the majority of you live horrible lives. Always worried about what someone else is thinking of you!
All of your stories are depressing!
Name: just wanted to say, email address not given
Subject: IGNORE THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Date: 4/7/99
oh give me a break people!! Boo Hoo for you your half black and white or Iam 1/4 of this and a 1/3 of something else! If people ask you dumb ?'s, tell them the truth and if they seem to look down on you IGNORE THEM Iam sure you have better things to do them deal with the dumb ?'s and comments of people in this world!!!!
Name: Miranda, miranda7085@hotmail.com
Subject: My Multiracial Quadruplets
Date: 4/5/99
I am the mother of multiracial quadruplets that were born on December 12, 1998. They are now almost four months old. And let me tell you, they are absolutely gorgeous! :) I am turning to myshoes.com to prepare me for the challenges that may come with parenting multiracial children. I am white, and their father is black and hispanic. So, while I am not biracial, I still need the support in order to raise my children in the best way possible. They will be raised to know all aspects of their heritage, but they will not be forced to take either a white or a black "side". I hope that they will appreciate all of the love that they are a part of and be able to see that it doesn't matter what color that love was.
Name: Robert, rjtheomf@webtv.net
Subject: My Web Page
Date: 4/4/99
Hello! I updated my page. I added some new stuff. You may want 2 check out multiracial section of my bookstore If you or know anybody you know would like 2 submit a essay, poem, photo links, or anything else to page. Let me know. I'll be happy to add it on my page :-) If you have comments or questions feel free 2 write me :-) http://www.geocities.com/soho/den/4969
Name: Donna Sauers, deej4@yahoo.com
Subject: Bi-racial adoptees
Date: 4/1/99
Do you know of any sites where bi-racial adoptees post their info. in their search for birth parents? Thanks for any help you can give me.