Well i'm 27 yrs old and i grew up in NYC-Queens all of my life. My mom is Chinese and my dad was Blk&American Indian. My first 8 yrs i grew up in the projects. And it was just about all Blk people and a few hispanic. I thought I always fitted in with everyone, but always felt a distane between us. At times unaccepted. But i was young so I never really thought about it. My dads side of the family doesn't seem to mind too much what my sister and I are.Maybe some of the females might be a little jealous because of her complexion and hair. But theres no reason to be. My mothers side of the family is Chinese and thier mates are all white. When we used to go there when I was younger I used to feel funny because all of thier friends were upper class white people and no black people. I always felt like if we we'rent there family and they saw us walking down the street. How would they percieve us. Would they be afraid or not care.They make me feel comfortable. Maybe i take to too far. When i was in J.H.S. i started to feel more left out. All of the Chinese kids would have nothing to do with me. They would all stick together, but only acknowledge me cause we were in the same school.Outside of school I had a mix of racial friends. I never met anyone who was mixed like myself so I felt unique yet diff. Like why would'nt people give me the same respect. I have never dated a oriental woman. Once i met a cool chinese girl but she said she could'nt date me, cause her dad only wanted her with a chinese man. I said well i'm 1/2 and she said it didn't even matter. I felt like i was stuck in the middle. When i entered H.S. things were still the same. Excpet it was the blk kids this time. They would all hang out together and yet they wouldnt put me down. I look Hispanic and the hispanic guys knew i wasnt hispcanic after awhile. They would talk to me in Spanish as if they knew i was hispanic. I had to correct them. Then they would be like ok well catch you later. I always felt sheltered. But yet i still remained proud of what i was. All that i wanted was for people to acknowledge me for who i am. I would tell my mom about it, but what can she say? Theres a Chinese resturaunt that i go to alot. And they had no idea i was Chinese for the longest time. One day i went out and bought a charm with my family name in China. When i walked in they said hey thats my last name and i said oh yeah cool. I'm 1/2 chinese and they seemed so suprised. I felt good that they finally knew but it hurt because not even my own people know what i am. My cousins are all Chinese and White. They have fair skin but you can tell they are Chinese in there eyes. I dont have that. At times i feel jealous that they have that over me. As i get older i try and accept it more and try not to take it to hard like the world is against me. But people are always talking spanish to me.

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